


Those Who Grow Together

by GrimmVertigo



Series: We Are As Gods [4]
Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Alternate Universe - Gods, AstralsAU, Awakening Powers, M/M, Noctis as the Infernian, Nyx as the Glacian
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-26
Updated: 2017-11-26
Packaged: 2019-02-06 22:29:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12827457
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GrimmVertigo/pseuds/GrimmVertigo
Summary: A look into how Nyx and Noctis's relationship began, how it fell apart, and how it starts to be repaired.





	Those Who Grow Together

**Author's Note:**

> Writing this was so much fun. But also a pain in the ass at the same time? ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> I would recommend reading the previous parts before this, to avoid being lost and confused.

The relationship that Nyx and Noctis share has always been an amicable one. 

Nyx was assigned to Noctis as his personal guard from a relatively young age – when the prince was around nine. This was not done out of any fear for Noctis's life, nor the need for extra protection, but because Noctis showed a proclivity to the magic of the Crystal very early on, and Nyx was the best in the Kingsglaive when it came down to it. 

It was through Nyx that Noctis learned how to warp properly and safely, how to call upon elemental magic in an offensive manner and learned how to shield those in need of protection. It was Nyx who trained him in the rough-and-tumble Galahdian style of fighting, using agility and quick strikes to get the upper hand on an enemy. 

And four years later, when Noctis began to recover from the near-fatal wound left over from the Marilith attack, it was Nyx who taught him all over again, guiding him through the paces with a sly smile and a patient tone. 

Anyone looking in from the outside would see the obvious validity of their companionship. Nyx had been at Noctis's side for a good portion of the prince's life and never showed anything but unwavering loyalty; of course they would be a little closer than the usual guard-and-charge duo. But if you were to ask Noctis, he would raise a brow and shake his head, because to him, it always felt as if there'd been something _more_ between them. 

Noctis always had an underlying feeling of trust for the Glaive, even when they first met, when he was still a small boy, shying away from strangers upon first meeting. There was something about Nyx that made him feel safe from the moment they were introduced. Regis and his council had assumed this was because of Nyx's kind, laidback nature. After all, whenever he was in the field, he instantly garnered the trust and attention of civilians he encountered, and it was assumed that Noctis had fallen for this same charm. 

Some seven years later, and the truth of Nyx and Noctis's relationship would be brought to light; the truth of how Nyx was the goddess Shiva in mortal form, how within Noctis slumbered the fiery spirit of Ifrit, and how, millennia ago, the two were once lovers - what Noct then knew to be the source of their seamless comradery. 

It was the awakening of the Infernian's power that brought long-kept secrets to the surface, and it was this that had Noctis questioning Nyx's entire existence. 

Nyx knew _everything_ \- who Noctis really was, what would come to pass with the awakening of Ifrit's power, and, to some extent, what Bahamut was planning. He knew, and yet he'd kept it all from Regis, from people who might have been able to help, from _Noctis_ himself. 

After the rather explosive reveal of Noctis's true nature in the throne room, after he had woken the next day and was able to think clearly, he took one look at Nyx and turned away. It suddenly felt like he didn't know who the Glaive was, felt like he was looking at a stranger wearing Nyx's face. Except, even then, it hardly seemed like _Nyx's_ face at all, and more that of a stranger. There were little details that now caught his attention, small things Noctis hadn't noticed before; the inherent chill that hung in the air around him, his lower-than-normal body temperature, an old, dangerous look behind his icy blue eyes like a wicked sharp icicle waiting to fall. 

The dynamic of their relationship changed overnight, and while Clarus and Ignis had done an excellent job in keeping the events that took place in the throne room under wraps, those under the employ of the royal family still knew something was off. Rumors still circulated around the Citadel, about both Noctis's true nature and his relationship with Nyx. 

Noctis pretended not to hear the whispers. He pretended that the hushed words 'Ifrit' and 'dangerous' didn't make him hurt. He pretended that Nyx wasn't a constant at his side, the Glaive gone stoic and quiet since the Awakening, as Noct had taken to begrudgingly calling it. 

But it was hard to pretend that Nyx didn't still help. 

Since Noctis had become aware of the power that slept within him, he had been more on-edge and worried than ever before. It had become a constant in his life, a point of heat sitting right at his belly, making him feel uncomfortable all the time. Sometimes it would expand into his chest and feel like a terrible bout of heartburn. It was difficult to control, would ruin his appetite and mood for days on end. The only thing that helped was Nyx. 

When it got really bad, Nyx would force Noctis to sit on the carpet in the center of his room, close his eyes, and breathe. The Glaive would hold his hands – sometimes his shoulders or his face if it was particularly wild – and just breathe with him; inhale a cold bite of air, exhale a cloud of warmth. Inhale deep, hold for a second, exhale slow and steady until there was nothing left, repeat. The chill of Nyx's skin against Noctis's own helped to ground him, to keep him steady and remind him that he wasn't alone. 

But Noctis was still wary of the Glaive, still didn't quite know what to think about him, about them, about the situation they'd stumbled into. 

Only after Nyx saved his life from Bahamut did Noctis start to drift back. 

The training they did to control the Infernian's power felt almost nostalgic, despite how frustrated it made Noctis get most of the time. It brought back fond memories of when he was just learning how to warp, or how to conjure a solid protect spell, because even though he now knew of Nyx's true nature, it was still the same man as before, pushing him on with teasing jabs and wry smirks. It was still the same man giving him playful shoves and encouragements when something went right. 

Noctis was really only confused about what sort of a relationship they'd had in the past. He wasn’t stupid; he'd noticed the way Nyx would stare and smile when he managed to not blow something up, the way his casual touches sometimes lingered a few seconds too long, how he'd watch when he thought Noctis was sleeping. There was something sad behind those moments, and when it really bothered Nyx, the temperature in the whole apartment would drop several degrees. 

Whatever they'd had between them before, Nyx wasn't over it, not by a long shot. 

So, of course, Noctis corners him one morning when making coffee. He swoops in and grabs the full pot before Nyx could lay a finger on it, because the man has never been able to control himself around hot drinks and somehow always makes them cool faster than they should. So Noctis pours coffee for them both, replaces the pot, and holds his own warm mug to his chest, breathing in the hearty aroma of shitty black coffee. 

"I want to ask you something," he says after a small sip, carefully jumping up to sit on the counter. 

Nyx just arches a perfectly trimmed brow and takes a drink from his own mug. He makes an upset noise, and when he brings it down from his face, the coffee inside has already stopped steaming. Noctis stifles a laugh and stares down at the mug in his lap, worrying his lower lip as he thinks of what to say. 

"What was our relationship like?" He asks softly. "Y'know. Back then." 

He hears Nyx sigh and raises his gaze in time to see him dump the mug of lukewarm coffee down the sink, leaning heavily on the counter afterwards. 

"Noct, you know I don't think it's a good idea to talk about that." 

"Yeah but you won't tell me _anything_ about what happened." He sets his mug down and angles his body to face Nyx. "You said something about memories once, right? About how you're afraid I'll lose myself to them when they start coming back. Don't you think it'd help if I already knew some things? That it might... I dunno... Lessen the load?" 

Nyx lets out a half laugh and shakes his head. "I don't think that's how it works, little prince." 

"And on the off-chance that it does?" 

The silence hangs between them for several moments, until Nyx sighs and pushes himself away from the counter. He runs his hands through his hair as he steps over to the rug in the middle of the floor, sitting slightly off-center. Noctis takes his mug of coffee and follows, taking up his usual spot in front of him. 

"I'm not gonna tell you everything," Nyx says in a commanding tone. "Too much could trigger the memories coming back too soon and we aren't anywhere near prepared enough for that. So if I don't want to answer a question or explain something, please understand that that's why." 

Noctis nods, and Nyx takes a moment before continuing. 

"The stories written tell of us – Shiva and Ifrit – being lovers. Except that's not entirely accurate, not in the way the word is used among mortals. I don't even think there's even a word to properly describe what we once had. The closest I can get is symbiotic, and even that just comes off weird." 

"It sounds like you're talking about plants," Noctis says with a frown. 

Nyx chuckles. "Yeah, that's not a perfect word for it, but it's all I got right now. Hell, you've seen how well we react to each other, in terms of our elements." As if to prove a point, he holds out a frost-covered hand. Noctis reaches out and grasps it, his own coated in a thin flicker of a flame. Where their skin meets, steam rises up, and the temperature between them evens out. "Opposites attract, after all." 

Their hands stay clasped for a few seconds more, until Noctis gently pulls away. "So... It was sort of like a relationship out of necessity?" 

"Partially," Nyx says with a light shrug, folding his hands in his lap. "Fire and ice do even each other out, it's true, but they also complement each other. They can exist as one if a delicate balance is upheld, or they can tear each other down. It was convenient if one of us were to get out of hand, to have the other come in and make peace." He shrugs. "I guess we just grew comfortable with each other's company. Sort of like two halves of a whole." 

Noctis nods. "Like light and dark. Can't have one without the other, right?" 

"Yeah, something like that." 

"Then... What happened? Why didn't you stop Ifrit when he destroyed Solheim?" 

There's a pained look on Nyx's face and he shakes his head, lips pressing into a thin line. The air around them gets a little colder. Noctis is well aware of the habit Nyx has when he's upset, having needed to carefully thaw the entire apartment once or twice before. He doesn't push the subject. 

"Okay... If you can't tell me that, then can you tell me what we were like? What... _I_ was like?" Noctis pauses, then frowns and shifts uncomfortably. "It's weird thinking of Ifrit as myself." 

The corner of Nyx's mouth quirks upward in the beginnings of a smirk. "It's weird for me, too; you don't really share personalities. Ifrit cared for his people, same as you, but he was the epitome of benevolent god, with all the temples and worshipers to go with it. Oh man, the festival days were a sight to behold." A sort of wistful expression falls over his face as he full-on smiles. "All six of us were worshiped, of course, and Mother Eos, at that time, but the people loved you the most. The festivals would run for days, each day dedicated to a different Astral, but the people of Solheim always saved you for last, to go out with a big bang and ring in the new year every spring." 

As he tells the story, his smile grows, and he practically quivers with excitement, scooching closer to Noctis until their knees are touching and they're close enough to feel each other's breath on their faces. "One time we snuck down into the city in disguises and just wandered the streets, and everyone was so kind, you know? We didn't have anything to trade or buy with, but the food carts would always give us a bite or two of whatever they had too much of, if we asked. There were dances in every square and plaza, music and lights all over the city, people laughing and enjoying themselves and giving homage to _us_." 

Noctis laughs. "Sounds a lot like the immigrant districts, when they have their festivals." 

Nyx's eyes light up and he nods enthusiastically. "Yeah, but Solheim was so much _better_ , because we were _everywhere_! The people revered and respected us, gave us the recognition we deserved and made sure we knew that they were thankful for all we did for them, for their land and their lives. Oh, it was glorious." 

As Nyx trails off, a thought crosses Noctis's mind, and his smile slowly fades, turning into a slight wince as a sudden bout of pain rushes through his forehead. "But Ifrit destroyed it all." 

It's like a switch is flicked, Nyx suddenly getting serious and concerned, a little frown starting to mar his features. He opens his mouth to say something, but Noctis interrupts whatever he has to say. 

"Solheim isn't around because Ifrit destroyed it, because _I_ destroyed it, because-" A wince and another spike of pain, behind his eyes. "Because the people stopped caring, got greedy, wanted too much and gave too little." The air around them starts to warm up, his palms filled with a heat that can only lead to fire. He almost doubles over from the sheer amount of hurt that suddenly runs through his body, but then there's two cold hands at his temples and another cold point in the center of his forehead, easing away the pain. 

When Noctis opens his eyes, not even knowing when they shut, he's met with Nyx looking more concerned and worried than he's ever seen before, and because their foreheads are touching, he gets a close-up of those icy-pale blue irises and finds himself lost in their gaze. 

"Focus on me, Noctis," Nyx is saying, breath cold against his face. "Don't think about anything else, alright? Just stay with me." 

Noctis nods and drops his head forward onto Nyx's shoulder, breaking contact and practically falling into the man's lap. Arms wrapped in a winter's chill come up and circle around his back, pulling him in closer. 

"That's exactly what I wanted to avoid," Nyx murmurs, turning his face into Noctis's hair. "Remembering is dangerous at this point. Fuck, I'm so sorry I did that to you." 

Noctis shakes his head and pulls away, but doesn't break their embrace. "It's... I know it's not actually fine, but if these memories are gonna come back, I'd rather they be on my terms, and with you around." Nyx doesn't look convinced. He sighs and offers a reassuring smile. "You said it yourself, Ifrit and I are basically two different people. I don't plan on losing myself to him anytime soon." 

"What you plan doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things, little prince." 

He lightly thwacks Nyx's chest. "Shut up, I'm trying to make you feel better." 

"I know," Nyx says with a soft smile. "Just... Promise me you won't try to work your way around my storytelling rule in the future. 

Noctis gives Nyx an accusing look. "I didn't do it on purpose. But yes, I promise." 

Nyx hums in approval and presses a light kiss to the tip of Noct's nose, who sputters and tries to pull away from his embrace, only to be brought in closer with a lighthearted laugh.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Comments and kudos are what keep my soul alive. <3


End file.
